Boys are so weird.

Okay, so you all know that I go to Peet's a lot. 

The one in Pleasant Hill to be exact 

(stalkers take note). 

I usually get tea because

 A. It's cheap

B. It's not bad for you

We have also established that tea makes me pee like a race horse. 

So, I often occupy the bathroom at the Pleasant Hill Peet's. 

And can I just say that boys are not considerate. I cannot even count the times that I go in there at the seat is up. If you are at your home and you do that, and your wife has to put it down, that is still disgusting, but you guys know each other pretty well, so it's more annoying than gross. I have to put the seat down from guys that could be total creepers. Ew. 

Another thing, who raised these men? Two men? 

Just another reason why it is important for children to have a father AND a mother. 

Put the seat down, jeez. 

It's almost the most wonderful time of the year.

Not that I think I'm an amazing photographer or anything, but I took this picture of Maddy last year while we were decorating the tree, and I pretty much love it. 

Also, I know that it isn't Thanksgiving yet, but I would just like to say that I'm about to poop my pants out of excitement that in a mere 11 days, I will be listening to Christmas music! 

Uhm, I might cry. 

Excuse me. 

I love this.

When I was little I wanted to be Shirley Temple so bad. 

To this day I sometimes still sing this song when I wake up in the morning. 

I love it. 

Seriously guys, come on

Okay, so I am seriously not offended by swearing. Like, not at all, you may swear up a storm and I will not think any less of you 

(well, I might think you sound retarded, and that you are completely uncreative in the English language department)

I don't think that swearing is wrong, I just think that it's not polite. 

Especially for girls.

But, one thing I don't like is people taking the Lord's name in vain. 

I'm not talking about "oh my god",  I'm talking about the people, at my work for example, who today decided that the phrase of choice would be "Jesus f*cking Christ" 

Like, really? Really? 

It was just lame. 

So, from now on, my new favorite thing to say in anger will be: 

Brigham freaking Young.

Stick that in your pipe and smoke it. 

I'm sorry if this post was offensive to anyone.. . wait, who are we kidding , no I'm not. =)

My childhood favorites

Thank you Grandma

This will take up a half hour of your life

It's totally worth it.

Be prepared.

*Ahem* 

Too my future husband:

I will be naming the children. 

Olive, Ingrid, Luna, Jude and Peter. 

I'm not sure if I want to have that many children, but better safe than sorry in the name department. 

That's what I always say. 

Ahahaha, I need more sleep.

So, today at work, I was just dead tired from my stupid all nighter that I pulled. Really really tired. 

I walked outside to drop a check at one of my tables, and I saw this truck. 

I could have sworn that it said cock fight. 

I was so confused. I thought to myself, wait, they don't do cock fights in the back of semi's, and. .. they are illegal, why are they advertising it that openly? 

Then I realized how stupid I was, went back inside, and didn't tell anyone about my poor use of brain cells. 

I am the champion. The very tired champion.

Your face

Your face on an all nighter

Any Questions? 

Sometimes I consider the bathroom my home.

I have peed so many times tonight. 

I blame it on the amazing Winter Solstice tea of which I am on my third mug. 

Oh dear.

I have been officially distracted for a good 20  minutes. 

Just how big can I get my hair without teasing it? 

The world may never know. 

Emily Sandberg: Procrastination at its finest. 

I'm a dirty hippie.

There was never a good war, or a bad Peace. 

-Benjamin Franklin 

Because I love them.

I'm procrastinating. Really. 

A lot. 

I'm still writing essays. 

And it sucks. 

Can you tell I'm writing an essay?

"I scrambled up to childhood, fell with a crash into girlhood, and continued falling over fences, up hill and down stairs, tumbling from one year to another till; strengthened by such violent exercise, the topsy turvy girl shot up into a topsy-turvy woman."

-Louisa May Alcott

I'm going to live in a tree house.

I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, to see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when it came time to die, to discover that I had not lived. -Henry David Thoreau, Walden

History.

Congratulations Barry. I hear they have a nice gym in the White House. 

P.S. Is he not really half black? I think he is more head black, and body white. 

She is cranking them out today.

"I think if I ever have a black son, I would name him some kinda of weapon, like machete" -Maddy

Me and a little Banjo I like to call. . . I still haven't named it.

I know, I know, I'm really good. 

You don't have to tell me. 

Just say no to raising rabbits for winter accessory purposes.

I have a story. 

So I was at the Denny's the other day with my family, and we were talking about crazy home schooling families. 

I was reminded of this time when I was about 11, and in my most awkward stage that I was ever in. 

My mom signed me up to be friends with a girl who owned more rabbits than I have ever cared to see in my life, and used their fur to knit. 

We played Mancala for hours. 

There are two kinds of people in this world who play Mancala.. . 

Home schoolers and africans. 

It is a memory that will be with me forever and ever. 

I'm not sure how I feel about that. 

P.S. I found out at a later time that their family re-enacts the manger scene in front of their house at Christmas every year. Apparently no one told them we live in a Ghetto. 

My heart is about to jump out of my chest. On to the floor. And die.

(Click on the picture to see it bigger)

Quote of Saturday

My mom explaining to another home schooling mother why I volunteered to be part of the Living History program at Sutter's fort. 

"Yeah, she really enjoys role play." 

The home schooling mother ran away. 

Really fast. 

I'm never gonna stop the rain by complaining.

It's going to rain! 

It's going to be ridiculous! 

Huzzah!

I have a headache.

Warning: I'm about to talk about how I feel. Crap. I hate it. 

So, I was trying to remember the last time I was home for a whole day. . . and I can't. 

I really do not remember the last time that I had a whole day at home. 

Pretty much how I feel is that if I don't have a day off soon, I might explode. 

My head may explode into a thousand million pieces. 

I also can't remember the last time I slept till after 7am, and went to bed before 11:30. 

I am going to run myself in to the ground, very soon. 

Close exhaustion of the 3rd kind.

If those kids don't enjoy their decorations tomorrow. . . 

I'm going to punch them. 

a-m-a-z-i-n-g

I'm in love with this movie. 

In love. 

Notting Hill. Watch it. 

Quote of the day

I bought feathers for my hair today at Michael's. 

I love them. 

Mel: Em, you have feathers in your hair. 

Me: I know, do you like them? 

Mel: Uhhhmmm. . . uhhhh. . weelllll . . . hmmmm. . . they are. . . different? 

Oh Jim, you're such a tease.

I don't know if I've said anything about this lad. 

He is one of the other guys that my free single self is in love with. 

I don't know if it's his accent. . 

Or the fact that he looks a little like Paul McCartney 

(maybe better looking?)

There is a guy in my history class that looks like the street version of him. 

He is an artist. 

Let's just say. . . he is my favorite part of history class. 

Just say no to Russians.

Uhhhh. .  Uhhhhhhh ..  

UUHHHHHHHH. . . . 

I was asked out by a Russian today. 

He wanted to take me to see Saw V. 

I declined. 

I love them.

If slaughter houses had glass walls, everyone in the world would be a vegetarian. -Linda McCartney

Yes, that's you Mrs. Denny

I have so much pressure. 

I just found out today that people actually read this. 

Yikes. 

*Ahem* once again.

If I ever, ever, post about something from my life that is NOT stupid and pointless, but actually talking about myself in some way that I think people will want to know what is "up with me",  just stop me, just shoot me in the face. I'll forgive you. The world will be better off. 

I'm at Peet's. 

PROOF:

Yes, that picture was awkward to take. Especially since I was right behind the bathroom. Who knows what kind of unsuspecting victim would come out and see me taking a picture of myself. If that was to happen I would have no choice but to make it as uncomfortable as possible for them. 

Speaking of uncomfortable, there is some kind of "reunion" going on next to me between this guy and girl. I'm thinking it is something along the lines of, they were friends in high school and met again though some kind of facebook/myspace. I feel a little chemistry between them. . . awkward chemistry. If they start making out, I'm leaving. 

hmph.

I got a banjo. I love it. 

That's all I'm going to say about it because I've been trying to post an amazing video of my talents all day and it isn't working. 

Hmph. 

Just to be clear. . .

Let It Be is not a catholic song. Mother Mary is not THE mother Mary. 

It's Paul's mom. 

And for the record, Paul McCartney is one of the best looking men of all time. Beard and all. 

"It just popped"

Your head's too big it's taking up too much room, your head's too big, it grows like a balloon and it just might float away, and if you're unluckier than that, someone such as myself might come along, and it just might pop. It was an accident. . . it just popped. Your head's too big, it's taking up too much room, it's filling with hot air. You're making your own self swoon, you're in love with yourself. your head's so big and tall,how is it then your thoughts are small? Your heads so big and tall, You found yourself and lost us all. Your head's too big,it's taking up all the room. It's broken through the atmosphere, you're rubbing elbows with the moon

-The Ditty Bops

Okay, so today I had the best compliment of my life. It was intense. 

I was serving this table (table 33 to be exact) it was a man and a woman. The guy was older, in his sixties, and the woman was maybe in her late 40s early fifties. I dropped off their food, and asked if I could get them anything else. They said no, so I started to walk away when the guy grabbed my arm and said, "I'm sorry, I just needed to tell you, you must know this, I'm sure you know this, but I just have to tell you that you have the most captivating eyes, they are beautiful, and sparkling, and just, just, just captivating." Then the lady that was with him said, "Yes, we were just talking about it, and you are just one of those people you hear about, those waitress who are discovered by famous movie producers and  are the next big star. That is going to happen to you, I'm positive. I don't know how it couldn't. It's going to happen." 

 

Best compliment I've ever gotten. 

Ever. 

So apparently I'm going to be a huge star. 

I leave everything I own to my dog.

Once upon a time there was a girl named Emily who was very sensitive to caffiene. A very nice Peet's lady offered her a sample of a Pumpkin spice latte and Emily gladly accepted. Little did she know this latte would make her feel like she wanted to die. Soon her heart would jump out of her chest and he hands would be so shaky that she could no longer type and write blog posts for all to enjoy. It was a sad end to a short and full life of blogging. 

And everyone cried and missed her very much. 

The end. 

On that note, hope everyone is having a great day. 

my music autobiography

The Beatles. I will love them forever. End of story. Listen to Here Comes The Sun. 

The Shins. Musical geniuses is more like it. Listen to 

Sea Legs. 

The Ditty Bops. They bat for the other team. I know. I just like their music. Listen to The Weeds are Winning. 

Chet Baker. I would have married this man for his trumpet playing abilities. Listen to Everything Happens to Me. 

Cat Stevens. Hands down best musician ever to be banned from the good ol' USA. Listen to Oh Very Young. 

Ben Kweller. He reminds me of Maria because we both love him. Listen to I Need You Back. 

The Andrews Sisters. Does it get any better? I want to be them. Listen to Crazy Arms.

Regina Spektor. She is my favorite girl singer of all time. Listen to Samson. 

Jason Mraz. So apparently I have a thing for guys named Jason who sing. Listen to Love For a Child. 

And that my friends, was my music autobiography. 

In no particular order. 

You say it's your birthday? Well, it's Brittany's birthday too, yeah.

Happy Birthday to my ridiculously good looking oldest sister.

There really is more to life, Britt. 

Hope you had a great day. 

And now you get your yearly, "I love you very much".

I love you very much.

Remember

If I ever start making posts about things that happen in my life that no one cares about. . . like what I ate for breakfast, how I'm so blessed to live in America, or what my favorite fabric softener is, and why. . . . 

shoot me in the face. 

The face. 

Oh, oh, and you're Mary Tyler Moore.

Today a guy came into my work with Buddy Holly glasses on. 

It reminded me to marry a guy who wears Buddy Holly glasses. 

Celebrity quote of the day

"I'm glad I didn't have to fight in any war. I'm glad I didn't have to pick up a gun. I'm glad I didn't get killed or kill somebody. I hope my kids enjoy the same lack of manhood." 

-Tom Hanks

Happy Birthday sister Rachel (she's not a nun).

Hope you had a great day! =) 

We love you!